Becoming a “normal” Married Couple, Part One

Many people these days begin living with their future spouse before they get married, the rest move in together after their wedding day. For Jaz and I though, that day was a year and a half after we got married. Those of you that have read this blog in the past probably know that we got married in Sydney as part of our three month trip. After travelling New Zealand for a month together, we had to say goodbye at the Auckland airport. Needless to say, the tears were worse than at any other time we had previously had to say bye. And they didn’t really stop. I cried for well over a month after getting home. (Thank you to the few friends and my mom who had to deal with me!) We quickly settled back into our routine, although our few times a week phone calls turned into every day talks.

As soon as I got home, I started the marriage visa process, an ordeal that began with the U.S. Post Office. Our marriage license had gotten lost from Sydney, and it took me over a month to replace it. After finally having proof we got married, we could file the paperwork! I never imagined what immigrants go through, or how long and intrusive the visa process can be. Luckily we had found an immigration lawyer, conveniently located 6 floors below my office, who was a huge help in filing. All I had to do was provide the necessary documents. Letters from family and friends proving our relationship was real, pictures of the two of us together, 3 years of my past tax returns to prove I could support Jaz should he not have a job, a police report from England showing Jaz had no record, and the list goes on. We were told this process would take around 10 months, but possibly up to a year.

Our rule of visiting every 3 months was still in place, and I went to England for Easter. Since I had only met Jaz’s family briefly on my first trip to England, it was great to be able to spend time just hanging out and getting to know everyone. I brought all my Easter traditions with me as well. Jaz said he’d never dyed eggs, so we did that. Everyone was a bit grossed out by blowing out the eggs, but they turned out very pretty. I made Jaz an Easter basket, filled it, and hid it once I got there. I requested he make me a basket as well before I arrived, but I think he was a little surprised by how all out I went. I did get my chocolate fix though, so he got points for that, as well as pointers for later!

photo 1-Optimized

I also started what became a bit of a tradition for me. I brought baking supplies to make chocolate cupcakes. It is very exciting for me anytime I have a larger audience than just me, and perhaps my dad, to try out new, pretty recipes! These are the cute “carrot” cupcakes I made, which were served to rave reviews.

photo 1 (1)-Optimized

photo 1 (2)-Optimized

Next up on our visit schedule was actually a trip we’d started planning over a year prior. Jaz managed to get us tickets to two Olympic events! So in August, I went back to England and we got to see an afternoon of beach volleyball (my choice), and a whole day of tennis at Wimbledon (Jaz’s choice). We also had a side excursion to Budapest for a few days, which I’d asked Jaz to plan to round out the number of tables I wanted at our Michigan wedding :). On top of that, I made Jaz a belated monstrosity of a birthday cake, so we had quite a busy week.

cake2   cake

In case these visits seem one-sided, our lawyer had warned us that it might be difficult for Jaz to visit the U.S. while going through the visa process. The airport people could think he was trying to skip the waiting process, he could miss a request for information that would hold up the whole thing, etc. So back to England for me in October! We scheduled this visit over my birthday, and Jaz surprised me with a day trip to Brussels! It was moments like these that made me feel sometimes like we were on The Bachelor. All our times together were marked by big adventures and seemingly extravagant dates, with not much time actually spent in each others company.

Jaz received approval on the first part of the visa status in August, which meant all he had left was the interview portion. We were told that once you’re past the first step, you’re not going to get denied, so we breathed a sigh of relief after this. But it also meant we had to make a big decision. Although we both loved our wedding in Australia, we went into it knowing that we wanted to be able to celebrate at home with our families as well. The big question was whether Jaz’s visa would be wrapped up in time for him to come to the U.S. and have our one-year anniversary “wedding”. We ultimately decided that it’d be better for us in the long run (although not in the moment emotionally) for Jaz to be able to transfer, which wouldn’t be possible till May of 2013. Which meant our second wedding was just another visit, but luckily Jaz didn’t have any problems entering the country.

This all led to lots of stress for me (some of it self-imposed, I am addicted to Pinterest), planning a wedding and work was going crazy all at the same time. All of it was worth it though when Jaz arrived in December. He immediately got put to work on the leftover projects, and we wrapped things up in time to enjoy Christmas. It was exciting for the families to meet for the first time, and we were both thrilled to be able to share our marriage with our close friends and family.

Optimized-img_1038

Optimized-img_8172

Dropping Jaz off at the airport this time did not seem as bad, the end seemed to be quickly approaching, and we both had to get to work to accomplish that plan.

One thought on “Becoming a “normal” Married Couple, Part One

  1. How interesting, Jill and Jaz. I guess I never realized just what you two went thru to be at where you are now. Great job, to say the least!!! LOve you both, Gma

Leave a reply to June Edwards Cancel reply